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What I don’t understand is how can two people that were supposed to care, love and protect such a special little
girl, their grandchild, could let something so horrible happen repeatedly over so many years and one not know about it and
two not stop it.
Then to not believe their own flesh and blood, call her a liar and then expect everything to be ok?
I think not. How could you both not believe an innocent young girl and do you know what’s worse, I wasn’t the
only one, you can call me a liar but you can call everyone else one too?
The both of you were supposed to protect
me from the dangers of the world but instead lead me straight into one of the worst kind, how could my own “grandparents”
have not known or didn’t either of you care, was it easier to turn away and pretend it wasn’t happening?? There
is no excuse that either of you can give me that justifies any of this, we were in the same house for so many years, how could
you both not protect me? Wasn’t I special enough? My parents trusted you both! Letting down your only daughter and her
first born child and then so many other children.
It’s taken me years to come this far, to be able to put these
words on paper, out of my mind and out of my betrayed heart, to ask you both a simple question that is on going in my mind
all the time. Why? Why did my own “grandparents” let this happen to me?
And when your granddaughter (yes
that’s what I am or was it forgotten?) writes an amazing piece in the paper after witnessing a horrible act of violence
which no one helped stopped you my supposed “grandmother” goes and says that it was “the writings of a disturbed
child” how is that being disturbed??? I and everyone else sees it concern for the welfare of the violence in (where
I live) teenagers and how dangerous it was becoming.
And if I were disturbed since you seem to think I am, where the hell
do you think it came from?
Children don’t just magically turn out disturbed you know, early childhood events shape
who they become as a person, how they act in different situations, feel towards themselves and to others. Childhood is such
a precious thing, the building blocks of intimacy – giving and receiving, trusting and being trustworthy are learned
in childhood so it’s got to be done right with care, love and protection.
Words can not express the anger and
resentment I hold towards the both of you, I look at my friends and their wonderful grandparents who are kind and caring and
think why aren’t they my grandparents? Why aren’t my “grandparents” like that wanting to know about
my life instead of calling me “disturbed”?
I just don’t understand, I guess I never will and to
forgive either of you for this… maybe that’s something I have to do one day but not anytime soon.
As for forgetting
it, well that’s never going to happen, I’ll always remember.
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